Friday, December 16, 2011

Man, the world has so much to offer... So many ways to better oneself every day, if one chooses to. There is so much to explore, it can be quite intimidating... Especially having squandered much of my twenties with booze and video games. I feel like I'm constantly having to catch up, not just in my knowledge of the world, the arts and science, but also with day-to-day-stuff most people learned to do at a much younger age. I feel like I am only now becoming an adult.

But indeed I AM becoming an adult. I suppose a lot of people never do grow up. I watched a new movie last week called Young Adult, starring a drunken, disheveled and delusional Charlize Theron (a wonderful performance!), which really reminded me of how far I have come. Hehe... Unfortunately, I could really relate! It also reminded me that there is always a choice one can make to stay stuck. I chose differently, and I'm very thankful that I did.

Even though in a lot of ways I am pissed off about having lost so much of my life battling depression, merely surviving, the experience does help me understand people and the world in a way that I otherwise wouldn't. Everything is learning material in the end. Every step that I made, brought me here to this very moment, and this moment is very fucking good. All of the stuff that was is still here, and more. All that the world has to offer, it still offers me. It is never too late to start ingesting the healthy and nourishing stuff: information, art, music, life. And ingest it I do, like a sponge.

Here is a rule to remember when anything tempts you to feel bitter: not, “This is a misfortune,” but “To bear this worthily is good fortune.”
– Marcus Aurelius


1 comment:

  1. Totally relate on the squandered twenties. Youth is wasted on the young.

    Your year seems to have been grand, filled with warm fuzzy feeling of getting comfortable with yourself and the world that surrounds. I can imagine as a performer it'll help you connect more personally to your audience, taking away some of the protective layers.

    I hope 2012 will deliver implied promises of the optimism in posted entries and we'll see some of them written in paste tense.

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