n. The providing of loving care and attention.
How utterly important this is for all of us!
All throughout my life, I have been put into anxiety-inducing situations such as live performances and interviews on TV and radio, concerts in front of high-power record label executives, high-level public appearances, with very little nurturance. No one ever taught me to do these things, or even offered me pointers, advice or support. I was just basically pushed onto the stage to do my thing, sink or swim. My first live appearance as an artist was at the age of 13 on one of the biggest live TV-shows in Finland. I do not remember having gotten any words of encouragement, preparation or even a private rehearsal in advance. I was just expected to set aside my nerves and perform, even at that young age. Inevitably, that performance left me with a feeling of sinking rather than swimming, and I hope to never have to watch the damn thing. I don't know that I ever actually have.
This kind of thing leaves scars. It left me with a bad association regarding performing--a feeling of inadequacy and aloneness. Despite the fact that I have developed into a world-class singer and a great performer throughout the years, this feeling of unpeacefulness has lingered.
This week perhaps for the first time I discovered that I don't have to be alone with my trepidations regarding challenges that I face in life. For the first time I received nurturance, support and help with preparation before a new task, and it totally altered the experience for me. This is what I've been missing all my life!
We all need encouragement and soothing, and someone who believes in us. The first time doing anything is challenging, but with the help of a healthy and loving friend, any challenge can be turned into an exciting adventure. The idea is to expand in life, to get through fears and constantly make life more fulfilling... Through nurturance from others we learn to nurture ourselves, and to me that seems to be the key to all the good stuff in life.(!)