I find myself looking forward to the new year like I never have before. I'm in the process of cleaning house, literally and figuratively. My life suffered from clogged arteries for a long time and now, after purposefully cleaning out the blockages within me and around me, blood is starting to flow freely through all veins again. It's quite a feeling!
This is not say that I'm completely healed, or that the house is completely clean. There are still problem areas... And life will always present many challenges -- that's the nature of it! But I feel like I'm almost at the spot where I can start from a clean slate to build my life and career anew. I've done the groundwork now and a basic structure is in place... This is exciting beyond words!
My anxiety has been a real disability for me in life. For many years it prevented me from fully inhabiting myself, from reaching any goals, from believing in myself. With all my fears, many aspects of being an artist were impossible. Maybe that's why I'm so excited about the coming months and year: as I clean house and wave goodbye to people who have hurt me, I also wave goodbye to my anxiety. This to me, is the closest experience to freedom that I have ever experienced. Without constant anxiety, anything is possible! Look out, year 2012.
"There is no such thing as part freedom." -Nelson Mandela
No comments:
Post a Comment